I’m 22 and not out to anyone (thinking about it, to a friend) but i just started going to a new college and decided that I would try my best to not lie anymore and let people know. But I’m a masculine guy my voice or walk don’t give anything away lol. I don’t know when or how soon i should let someone know? I’m just tired of having friendships then the topic of girls comes up and I’m just agreeing and playing along, not wanting to loose the friendship. So basically when and how should I let someone know that I am a gay?

Oh honey. They know. No one is as good at hiding it as they think they are. People don’t necessarily know you are gay, but they know something is up.

You are new at this college and you alone have the power to shape it into the kind of experience you want. Start showing up to gay social events, find where the queer kids hang out and dive head first into this new part of your life. If you are hanging out with your new straight friends and the topic of girls come up say that you aren’t interested in girls. If they aren’t troglodytes unworthy of your friendship they will be cool with it. Yeah, maybe you will get teased a little but that is just your opportunity to tease right back.

College is one of the great experiences for young gay guys. They get to leave behind whatever fictional life they lead in school and with their families and experiment with a brand new self in a brand new environment that has zero expectations about who you are. Some stop being the children of republicans and become pot smoking Communists (my favorite kind). Some decide they no longer have to please their parents or their teachers and start pleasing themselves. And countless multitudes of young faggots have decided that they are going to stop giving a fuck what their church or their school or their parents think about where they stick their dick and stick it where they want.

So come out as gay as casually as people come out as straight. And if you loose a friend you only lost an asshole not worth your time. Win win.

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